Motherhood Hurts

Nobody told me about the pain.

No, I'm not talking about labor. Certainly, that pain was covered. In spades. And I'm not talking about the pain of the heart, of having your heart walking around outside your body, of that palpable sadness that every parent feels when they read a news story involving a child. Not that either.

I'm talking about the head injuries. The pinches, the hair yanks, the kicks, the head butts, the bites. The eye pokes, the scratches.

Four times last night, when Nemo woke up and wanted to nurse, he announced his intentions by slamming his big old noggin right into mine, one time directly into my nose, which had been, up until that point, happily snoring away. He has taken to pulling my hair, of late, because he likes to see me squirm. He caresses my belly while he nurses, and when I least expect it, he pinches, teeny, tiny little pinches that hurt like hell and leave itty bitty black and purple marks.

Sunny has taken to doing the "go limp in the parking lot" thing, and then when I lean down to pick her up, suddenly finding her footing and thrusting her head up right into my jaw, and my arms are too short for me to leap out of the way to avoid the crushing blow unless I drop her. And oh, does she know that, and use it to her advantage.

Little Man has hit the age where he wants to wrestle, to jump on my back and play rough. Trout has reached the age where, if she defies me when sent to her room and I have to carry her, I have to throw her over my shoulders and stagger up the stairs, crashing into the wall as though she, or I, were drunk.

I'd trained for labor, for the fitness I'd need for the marathon exertion that is. This, this battering, I wasn't prepared for.

I'm asking Santa for boxing gloves for Christmas. I think a little sparring may be in order.

Comments

[Agincourtdb]

Yeah that head butt thing is a constant danger. I live in fear of losing my front teeth to one of those. :-)

[crazyjane]

somehow mine have all managed to step on my nipples at one point or another. my oldest actually broke my nose when he was about two. he was giving me a kiss and ended up braking my nose. seriously, someone should have warned me.

[crazyjane]

breaking. i can spell.

[Jillian Curtis]

Boys are rough and they sure can tumble. :)

Boxing gloves.. hmmm now there's an idea.

I'm new to your blog, please feel welcomed to visit mine.

Jillian