Why My Eldest is in Some Seriously Deep Yogurt

Trout is in second grade, and in our school that means a fair amount of homework. Each week during reading initiative, she gets an assignment on Monday and Wednesday, and those assignments are due Wednesday and Friday. They usually involve reading some book they send home and answering some sort of questions about what she read in her writing journal.

Tuesday afternoon I asked Trout about her homework, because I knew she hadn't done it the day before. She told me that the teacher got busy at the end of class and never handed the books back out. Because she has a track record of not always being entirely truthful, especially when it comes to getting out of doing something she doesn't want to do, I looked in her backpack for the book, which wasn't there, so I figured she was telling the truth and made her finish her spelling packet and then let her go play.

Yesterday afternoon I was writhing around on the floor exercising my muscles, and I happened to glance under my couch and instead of seeing the metric ton of cheerios I usually see, I saw Trout's reading bag with her books and journal in them.

It's a good thing I was already on the floor or the impact when I hit the ground after my stroke would have done some serious damage.

I called her on the carpet, literally, and demanded she explain herself. She couldn't. Of course she couldn't, she'd just been nailed and she knew it.

Now, I know kids lie. All of them. I did it a ton, too, but really I don't think I did it quite so deliberately when I was her age. And while I know it's normal and I did it, too, it's my job to send the message that this is unacceptable, that if she does this later in life it can lead to fines, imprisonment, and just maybe the loss of public office. And I'm miffed because it's just so disrespectful, and I don't handle that well. So what did I do to her?

The girl down the street invited Trout to her birthday party this coming weekend. Yesterday I marched Trout down to her house so that Trout could explain to both her and her mother why she won't be coming to the party that I'd already said she could go to. She was duly embarrassed. And when I was talking to BigDaddyFish on the phone about it I Emphasized. How. Angry. I. Was. You know, to make a point.

I'd like to say I think this will make an impression, but in reality it will just give her incentive to hone her skills and not get caught next time, right? How would you handle it?

Comments

[Agincourtdb]

Is it too late to get your money back? j/k. Kid lies to get out of homework. In other news, dog bites man. ;-)

[hokgardner]

I think you handled it well. The consequences were immediate and suitably severe.

I discovered last week that my girls had been "washing" their hair with water. Their shampoo had run out, so they filled the bottle with water and kept acting like everything was fine. Brandon and I had discuss with them lies of ommission. Then they got to go straight to bed without stories or even any play time. And now I stand guard while they scrub.

[angi]

UGH! I can't stand lying either.
Thankfully, so far, the oldest two are like me & they can not tell a lie (without a strange look/smile thing coming across their faces), but Zander will keep a straight face and tell stories and defend them to no end. Man, I hope it grows out of that. Anyway, I think you handled it very well. I am sure she will remember that conversation with her friend for a looooong time!

[jodifur]

I would have about lost my mind. I love your approach. I probably would have yelled and screamed and been completely ineffective.